Dang Horse

Day 3 in Krabi, Thailand
Friday, July 26th

"Great! I'll be ready in 5 minutes!" I exclaimed to Rich as I ran toward my jungle bungalow to quickly change into my running gear. He agreed to wait for me so I could join him for a morning run through the streets of Ao-Nang Beach in Krabi. 
The sun was strong and the skies were blue. I thought about how peaceful the morning was in this town where just 3 days ago a man from Texas got stabbed to death by 3 Thai musicians using sharpened metal poles. The beautiful limestone stacks to left and beach ahead combined with my runner's high and I had the feeling it was going to be a great day. 
Vasana, (who was the wonderful bungalow owner, chef, maid, and bookkeeper) told us that our taxi would be here soon to bring us to the 1st of our 3 excursions today: horseback riding. 

What this photo lacks in quality, it makes up for in truth! 

After getting in the bed of a pickup truck, our driver, a Thai dude who smelled like he just finished a date with the reefer, asked about our experience with horses. Most of us, including the 2 Swedish girls on board, were beginners. We arrived on the horse ranch about 20 minutes away. I mounted the brown and white horse and after a few tips spoken in broken English, we all took off through the horse ranch toward the beach. The tide was extremely high and already I could tell that my horse did not like the water. I could feel her hooves sinking in the sand and also could tell she was struggling to pull her legs out and move forward. Trying to keep my sneakers dry lasted about 5 seconds. We are really deep. This is not safe! I felt like I was on the back of Artex from The Never Ending Story and we were sinking into the Swamp of Sadness together. However, I wasn't sad. I was SCARED! What if I fell of the horse and my foot got stuck in the stirrup? The Dang horse would unknowingly drag me along until and even after I drown. Fearing my Cannon would get wet or fall in the water,  I swiftly spun my backpack to the front and shoved my camera inside.

I pulled the reigns in the direction I wanted my horse to go despite the rushing waves and hesitantly, she obliged.  Upon our exit from the beach area, we took the paved road for a bit until we reached the forest. Rubber trees colonized both sides of the road and I noticed tiny bowls suspended from each tree trunk collecting rubber. Cool. My horse kept bowing her head and I noticed its front legs were wrapped and she was sweating. At this point, I realized that something was off with my horse, and concluded she was a rebel and most likely hated me. If someone magically rolled up in a golf cart and asked if I wanted a lift back to our jungle bungalow, I would have been seated next to that driver before they finished their question. Maybe I should get off and walk this dumb horse. 
Earlier, Jasmine was the only one in our party who said she was somewhat experienced with horse back riding. Because of this, she grabbed a stick and started whacking her horse in the ass when she wanted to move faster. She was having a great time. With that being said, whenever her horse would take off running, SO WOULD MINE AND ABOUT 4 OTHERS including Marisa's. My horse, Dang,  wouldn't listen when I pulled on the reigns or when I demanded, "Walk!" At one point, Jasmine got so far ahead of our group that we saw her horse leap over a small stream in the distance. When the horse leaned back to begin his jump, she hung off the back of the horse as if she was starring as a princess in a Disney movie. Amazingly, Princess Jasmine not fall off her horse. 

Dang Horse

Dang (maybe named after Dang Fever? Does this horse HAVE Dang Fever?) continued trotting and galloping at will until we reached the break point. When I dismounted, I saw a great photo opportunity and swung my yellow backpack bag around to retrieve my Cannon.  To my dismay, my backpack was open and the camera was missing! "My camera fell out of my backpack!"  was all I could muster. In my deep water panic, I must not have zipped my pack all the way. Shocked and extremely worried, I asked the Thai man who had been tailing us on the moped to search for the camera. He easily accepted the task and I feared the worst. My camera was knocked out of my bag, off a horse, onto the ground and was lying in the middle of the jungle somewhere. The SD card inside contained pictures from Bangkok, Koh Tao, and Railay. I tried to mentally part with them and thought about the pictures that I had taken with my iPhone which was still safely tucked inside my pack. At the same time, I noticed Marisa's leg burns and immediately the burns on my inner calves began to flare up as well. We were idiots to wear shorts and were gripping the leather saddle's fender super tight! Thankfully, Rich loaned her pants and I stepped into my shorts extensions forgoing the opportunity to clean the horse hair out of my sizzling wounds. I just want to get this over with!  After what seemed like 20 minutes, but was only 5, the Thai man on his motorbike rode toward me with my amazingly undamaged $1,000 camera. Phew!
On the return trip, Rich fell off his horse gracefully after his backpack got stuck on a low tree branch and landed in an upright position on the beach. He followed his horse back on foot. Our guide fell off his horse as well and landed in the water.
The tide was low once we reached the beach. Thank God! However, selfish little Dang decided she was only going to leave room for herself to walk under the tree branches. I leaned forward, rested my head next to the horn of her saddle, and held on so tight you couldn't see daylight between the me and that horse. Just when I thought I was coming back with only a few minor leather burns (The running joke so far on the trip was that Kelly was the only person without an injury.) the loop of my backpack got stuck on a tree branch and launched me backward so I was now laying on my back. I wiggled free and sat up just in time to get bashed in the head with a thick tree branch. Of course Dang did not slow down one bit and probably wanted to get this stupid American tourist off her back as fast as possible. That branch hit me so hard that my gray bandanna fell off my head and onto the sand behind me. The swift little Thai man taking photos retrieved it and made sure I was okay. I was livid. 
The route through the ocean was unsafe and stupid. The waves crashed against the poor horses and our sneakers got soaked. With a chunk of ice on my head fastened down by my bandanna and my calves on fire I thought horseback riding sucks! 
Later, Rich and Jasmine had such terrible chaffing on their butt cheeks, that they had to take a trip to the medic to get themselves cleaned and bandaged.
We all had burns from the leather saddle on our inner calves and Marisa had them on her inner thighs as well. Ouch! My injury free days in Thailand were over
If all that pain wasn't bad enough...next we went to Tiger Temple.

After visiting the medic to dress Rich's and her own wounds, Jasmine cleans and bandages Marisa's Thai-style horseback riding battle scars.